Fathers' Day Cards RevisitedBy John Wayne Samples© 2000 JohnW@jsam.comSubjects:
The Son and Father is already on stage with a stool and stand to write on. son: Dear Dad. I was just going through
my junk drawer and came across that card you sent me on my very first Fathers’
Day, 25 years ago. It was so full of wisdom; and I don't understand how you knew
all that stuff, because you were just about the age I am now when you wrote
that, and my son is now the age I was then. Unbelievable! dad: Dear Son. I don't want you to think I'm being too mushy, but I'm going to write you another Fathers' Day Card today. I've been waiting 25 years for you to reply to the last one; maybe you didn't get it… Maybe I'll send this one by email with a return receipt requested! Maybe I’ll just wait another 25 years. son: I can't tell you how many times
I've sat down to write you a response to some of the things you wrote back then;
but I never knew where to begin. And when we were together, it always felt
awkward talking about stuff like that. I kept thinking I'd get around to it
eventually, so I didn't push it. dad: I've always known that you love me – I mean 47 ties in 37 years; How could I miss that message?! And even though you don't say the words a lot, those times when you have honored my values and taken my advice have always been so important to me. son: About the only regrets I've had in
my life, were all those times when I chose not to follow what you taught me, or
when I saw that look of disappointment. And now, with my own family, well, I'm
just sure that if I could have been a Father FIRST, I would have made a much
better son. dad: It's selfish of me, but I've always wondered what kind of father you thought I've been. I know I've done a lot of things that you didn't like or understand, but I think you know—I hope you know—that I was always trying to do what was good for you. Just the same, someday it would be nice to hear that you think I'm okay. It's not necessary, but it would be nice. son: I realize I don't have to say this
because you already know it, but I think you've done a pretty terrific job as a
Dad. If I've done half the job with my children as you did with yours, I'd
consider myself a success as a father. But even so, I wonder what my kids think
about the job I've done. Maybe someday they'll tell me. Maybe someday I'll ask,
but I hope I don't have to. dad: It's hard to believe that 25 years have gone by since you became a father yourself. I've shared in your joys as a parent, and in your heartbreaks. I've celebrated those Little League championships, and on those days when you didn't know if your child – or marriage – would survive, I cried with you. I know you didn't always see my tears, or hear my laughter, because you were so busy with life, but I saw more than I said, and I wept and smiled more than you saw. son: So many times since I left your
house I've wanted to run home to "Daddy" and have you embrace me. But
I didn't because, well, we were MEN, and I didn't want to embarrass YOU. But, as
long as I knew you were within reach, the successes seemed more successful and
the failures seemed survivable. And you always seemed to prefer
standing there at a distance, not wanting to interfere in the good times, and
maybe not wanting to know about the bad times. I wish you had celebrated with us
more, but I'm glad you were far enough away that my failures didn't cause you a
lot of pain. dad: I still marvel at how well you've done. Many men would have broken under the strain of what life often dumped on you, but you kept coming back, always a little stronger than before. You obviously were paying attention to some of the things I tried to teach you. Sometimes I wished you would have reached out to me more often during those difficult times, but I guess we all have different comfort levels about those things. son: It seems like every time life would
cut me a break and things would be going pretty good, I always found a way to
screw things up. Oops. I know you don't like that phrase, but I seem to have a
real knack for making things harder than they need to be. What did I miss in
what you were trying to teach me? I never found the instruction book on that
part. Sometimes I wished you would have reached out to me more often during those difficult times, but I guess we all have different comfort levels about those things. dad: I know you've had problems at home. Your relationships with your kids and wife have not always been what either of us would have hoped. Sometimes you were able to heal the wounds, and some of the wounds still need healing. Maybe I could have taught you better about some of that; and maybe you could have listened better. And maybe the point is to keep working on it, and learn what you need to pass on to your son as he approaches his first father's day. I wish I could make it simple for you, but hopefully you’ve learned by now that there are no short cuts in things like this. son: Dad, my son is
going to be a father soon, and I’ve been trying to think of some really smart
things to tell him about parenthood, things that would keep the family wisdom
alive. Maybe I’ll just digitize your old card, use my new computer to replace
your signature with mine, and print it out over at Kinkos on their fancy color
printer. On the other hand, you did sign it just “DAD” so... maybe I’ll
just give him the original. That’s a really bad idea. I know
there are no shortcuts, so I guess I’ll do it the hard way; I’ll retype what
you wrote and email it to him! dad: Happy 25th Fathers’ Day, my son. Give that wife of yours a kiss for me. And thanks for that tie that I’ll be getting later today. I love you. son [looking
over the card, then reconsidering]: [to the audience] [begins again] [wrestles with a closing] [Father and son put their cards in envelopes, hand to each other while smiling politely, and leave.] |
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